Eczema Update

So far so good, no recurring flare up this week.  This is day six of my treatment.  My skin is looking close to normal.  The skin is not as red as it use to be and does not feel as sensitive.  I always put sunscreen on every morning after putting oil and Vaseline on my face and the sunscreen use to sting like crazy.  I would just cringe and bare it because there is no way in hell I'm going to step outside my door without sunscreen especially during the summer.  The past couple of days the stinging wasn't as bad as it usually is.  I haven't worn make up in a while now which is normal for me during the weekdays, I don't usually wear makeup to work.  I reserve it for weekends and special occasions and even then I don't wear makeup.  If I do it's usually just eye makeup and lipstick, no foundation.  My skin doesn't feel smooth yet like it use to I still have rough patches almost like I have a layer of dead skin cells on my face but there is nothing I can do about that right now.  I don't want to exfoliate and risk inducing a flare up.  I'm going to continue with my treatments every day and with my fingers crossed I hope to kick this eczema's ass right out of my life.  Don't worry I'll keep you posted.

Amazed and Humbled

As I read works from writers past and present, I am always amazed and humbled by their brilliance and artistry.  As I read I can see the images floating in my mind, as if through a magical mist.  I could never hope to reach their level of art but as long as I have fingers to write I will keep trying even if in vain.

Guinea Pig

I'm not afraid to use myself as a guinea pig.  Because of the whole new experience I'm having with eczema, I've been doing a lot of research on it.  I wouldn't worry so much if it was affecting me anywhere else on my body but because it's concentration is on my face I'm forced to try all different kinds of remedies.  The oil and Vaseline is working well to moisturize my face and reducing the flaking but doing nothing for the redness and inflammation.  I haven't tried cortisone cream yet because I read that overuse of the product can lead to the skin thinning.  That's the last thing I want is for my skin to become thin.  So I'm trying something different and if it works I'll tell you what it is.  I'm on day three of using it and so far I've seen a little improvement but not sure yet.  I haven't even dyed my hair.  It's been ages and the grays are becoming more and more prominent, but I don't want any chemicals near my face.  The product I'm using according to the research I've read is that it has no negative side effects and is pain free.  The pain free part I can attest is true.  It's actually very therapeutic.  I'll let you know how I progress in my experiment.

Questions I Ask Myself

Why is it so hard for me
To show real emotion?
Am I as they say
Cold and brittle like ice?
Or is it something else
Something I just can’t see?
I am constantly asked if there is anything wrong
And for the life of me
I don’t know how to answer
Because in my head I’m humming a song
Is it my face?
Is it always frowning?
Am I not smiling enough?
My smiles are genuine
That I know
If I wasn’t happy
I think it would show
Maybe I’m quirky
And hard to read?
Most of the time I feel quite perky
So I don’t know
Why people always tell me
To tell them how I really am
When deep inside me
I’m as happy as a clam.

Christianity Equals Patriotism (Huh?)

Is it true that here and now in the United States in the 21st Century that Christianity equals Patriotism?  I recently watched a documentary of a discussion regarding religion and it’s role in politics and how it’s impacting our society.  The conversations were with a physicist, philosopher, biologist, theologian and an accredited screenwriter.  Of course it wasn't the main topic of discussion but it was a part of it.  It’s so hard for my feeble mind to understand how this has happened.  According to American history our forefathers came to this country to be free to practice their chosen religion whatever that may be.  To be free from tyranny and oppression.  For me, I don’t subscribe to any one particular religion, yes I was baptized a Roman Catholic but as I see it they all have the same basic moral message.  Good is good and bad is bad.  If I see a child lying bleeding in the street and I take the child to the hospital is that very Christian of me or Muslim of me or Jewish of me?  I think it’s very human of me.  Didn’t we settle this argument in the United States long ago about separating Church from State?  I’m sure a lot of people will disagree with me but I don’t understand the logic of why if a person isn’t Christian he/she isn’t a patriot.  Can we not love the country that we live in and still practice whatever beliefs we believe in whether we are Atheist, Christian, Muslim, Jew or Buddhist, etc…?

My World

Living in a world of fantasy
Is my reality
Where days are bright
The sun luminous
It’s rays giving off an ethereal light
The night is full of fogs and mists
Doom and gloom
I would not enter its darkness
I’ll stay cloistered in my room
For fear of what’s hidden in it’s midst
Emotions are extreme
Anger, fear, sadness overwhelms
Can you hear me scream?
Passions are epic
You can’t quench your desire
Love affairs are dramatic
All verve and fire
To love, to love with all of your heart
Not just a part
Sacrifice is the rule
Did you not know?
Are you living in a cesspool?
When entering my world
Take stock, be prepared
To be taken in a whirl
For life with me is not easy
I’m up, I’m down, I’ll squirm and turn
You might get queasy
Then you might find
You can’t leave me behind
Why?  Who knows?
That’s just how the story goes.

Two Years

You came again to me last night
It’s been too long
What message have you to give
I don’t want to get it wrong
In the room there were three
Other than you
One of them was me
The two they were a blur
But you I could see
The face so familiar
The voice so strong
You told me you had to go
But it won’t be long
You may come back
I cried out in protest
And then everything turned black
I woke up crying
The memory still fresh
My eyes opened to the sounds of morning
In my mind two words stuck
“Two years”
With any luck
As I wiped away my tears
I’ll decipher what it means
The message you bring me
In my dreams.

Technology Will Kill Me Someday

We are so dependent on technology that one day if a major worldwide catastrophic event were to occur we would perish, well most of us like me for instance.  Case in point, last night I came home from work to find that PG&E had shut my electricity off.  (So now I’m going to try to explain the series of events as orderly as possible).  I groaned to myself, “I must have forgotten to pay my bill”.  PG&E is the only account I don’t pay through my bank because the amount differs every month (I don’t receive paper statements, I’m trying to be as green as I possibly can) so I have to physically go to their website to make the payments.  Unlike my other accounts I just go to my bank’s website and choose the accounts I want to pay and I’m a mouse click away from paying all my bills for the month.  So simple, so easy, love it.  Well, there I was standing in the dark and I thought, “Oh I’ll just pay them online”.  I go to grab my laptop and I realize my internet is not on because the laptop, modem and the wireless router runs on ELECTRICITY!!!  (Note to self:  Pick up extra battery for laptop from my brother ASAP!)  After that realization I decided, “Oh well, I’m sure I can call PG&E and make a payment over the phone”.  I rummaged around in my boat of a purse to find my phone, grabbed it and readied my fingers to dial, my cell phone was dead.  (My boyfriend pays for my cell phone every month and every month he’s late with the payment.  I’m sure all of you have your own opinions about this little tidbit but you know what, you can shut it because I don’t care.  So what if he buys me a car for Christmas and pays my cell phone bill, albeit a little late.  Whatever.)  Anyways back to my story, so I grabbed my car keys and drove to the nearest phone booth.  Yes, you heard right, PHONE BOOTH.  Boy let me tell you, those are hard to come by nowadays.  In my youth they were everywhere.  Those phone booths were me and my friends' lifeline to the outside world and we knew how to use them.  I called my boyfriend at work,  gave him the rundown and twenty minutes later he and I met at a check cashing place that accepts payments for PG&E.  When I stepped up to the window the woman on the other side of the glass told me that if I make a payment through them, PG&E would not receive the money for 4 – 5 days.  Well, that wouldn’t work for me.  I need electricity NOW so she gave me an address to another pay center or so I thought.  My boyfriend and I drove to the address and it was an actual PG&E office and of course they were already closed.  I felt like I was on a wild goose chase with no goose to catch.  Frustrated, my boyfriend and I drove back towards my apartment when I spotted another phone booth.  Yes, a phone booth.  I pulled over next to it and dialed the 800 number that the woman from the check cashing place gave me along with the PG&E address.  I dialed the number and of course it was the office number that was closed but referred me to another 800 number.  I called that number and finally got hold of a human being that knew something of my dilemma.  She helped me with the process of making the payment (Did you know that when you make a payment over the phone it’s like a two to three part process if your electricity has been shut off?  First you talk to the initial representative, then she transfers you to an automated number where you give your credit card information and get a confirmation number and then you are transferred to the Smart Meter department where they press a button and your electricity is turned back on remotely).  That one phone call took about a ½ hour to 45 minutes with my boyfriend standing patiently beside to me.  He’s the best.  My evening was definitely interesting, kind of nice to break from the typical.  Well, in summary technology makes our life so much easier, without it I think I would die, really.   What the hell did I do before computers and cell phones existed?  I can’t even remember.

Practice

I'm practicing my writing skills.  They say if you want to be a good writer to write, write, write...until you figure out what works for you.  So here I am practicing my writing, maybe you'll like what you read and maybe you won't, let me know what you think.  Email me...my email is on my profile page.  If you look to the right of your screen you will see my pages section, one page is titled "Fictitious Story:  Diary of Yet Another Woman" this one is an ongoing story and the other is "Short Stories" self-explanatory.  I don't have much written so far but you can check it out and let me know what you think.  My writing most likely sucks.  I haven't taken a writing class in years and I've forgotten most of what I've learned.  But the point is to keep on writing, right?

11th Annual Veterans Appreciation Day Celebration

Braving the downpour veterans, their families and friends came together today to celebrate and honor our nation's veterans and heroes lost.  I was proud to be in attendance standing next to my father, a veteran himself of the Vietnam era.  It was very moving.  Tears were shed.  The National Anthem was sung by Angela Tirado.  She was amazing.  Her voice filled the entire room with emotion.  The POW/MIA presentation was very touching and I tried very hard not to cry.  Several Districts Assemblymembers, Councilmembers, a Supervisor and a Vice Mayor were presented and spoke in honor of the veterans.  My mother, a volunteer, worked tirelessly in the background.  I barely had a chance to speak to her.  I didn't see her sit down once.  (Her and my father are going to a birthday party tonight and I hope she has enough energy to dance.  Taking a nap before heading out is definitely in order.)  All in all it was a very nice event and I would definitely love to attend future functions.

Update - Eczema Situation

So, regarding my eczema situation.  I've been using the Watt's Moroccan Oil and the Vaseline Petroleum Jelly consistently every morning and night for the last few days and I've seen remarkable improvement in my skin.  The eczema covered almost my entire face with the exception of my forehead.  The worst areas were around my nose and along my chin line from ear to ear.  As I stated before it started around the same time as the allergies hit me a few weeks ago and I had no idea what was going on.  I was actually afraid and was in denial for a while.  I refused to see a doctor because I didn't think they could tell me anything I didn't already know or could find out for myself, so I self diagnosed.  I read about all the different types of rashes out there and I narrowed it down to eczema.  It was the most plausible explanation with the itchiness, the dryness, flaking and sensitivity.  I could no longer use my regular moisturizer because it would sting my face as soon as I applied it.  I read that with eczema you have to keep your face continuously moisturized and that oil and petroleum jelly helped with easing the dryness.  The middle of the night was the hardest.  It took all of my self control to not scratch my face.  What I discovered was, that it was most helpful when as soon as the itchiness would start I would slather on more Vaseline (I kept the jar next to my bed) and I would take a cold item and lay it across my face especially in the areas where it was the most itchy.  I had a bunch of eye pads that I kept in the refrigerator and that's what I used to lay on my face and what's great is that it's reusable.  In the morning I would just put them back in the fridge and they were ready by the time I went to bed that evening.  Those helped a lot with the itchiness.  The cold would numb my skin and I felt relief and was able to sleep through the night.  Benedryl helped a lot too but most night's I didn't want to feel drugged so I kept Benedryl around only on nights when it was really bad but for the most part I rarely had to use it.  My skin now is recovering nicely.  The eczema is no longer noticeable, I still feel it so I know it's still there and that I need to continue my routine but just the fact that you can no longer see it is amazing.  My face actually looks normal now.  And soon I'll be able to start working out again.  I stopped working out because I read that heat and sweat irritates eczema and might worsen it.  I'm looking forward to the day when it will no longer be there, when I'll be free.

Our Day Trip to San Francisco

Minnette and I decided to take a trip to San Francisco.  We took the BART train from the Fremont station to the Powell station.  It turned out to be a great idea.  We didn't have to worry about looking for parking and paying for parking fees.  The train ride took about an hour and as soon as we stepped off the train what greeted us was the hustle and bustle of city life.  Very different from the Silicon Valley environment that we are used to which compared to San Francisco I would consider very tame.  I loved it.  You could feel the energy in the air.  We went on a Friday so there were plenty of people going about their daily work schedule.  Men and women in suits carrying briefcases hurriedly scurrying around on their way to their office or to their next appointment.  Women in stilettos out pacing me in my flats.  How do they do it?  I know I couldn't.  I chuckled to myself, Minnette and I looked like tourists.  Me with my Lubitel camera hanging around my neck and my digital around my wrist.  Minnette also carrying her own digital camera.  From Powell we walked to Chinatown stopping along the way to take pictures at Union Square.  In Chinatown we explored the shops, ate lunch at a little Chinese deli type place (our lunch cost only $8.00 for two and could have fed 3-4 people).  We looked in on several other food shops because Minnette wanted to buy pork buns and rice cakes for her husband.  While she was purchasing her items I looked through a display of jade jewelry and purchased a jade ring to commemorate the day.  After purchasing the items we walked to Little Italy and had coffee at the cutest cafe (I forget the name but I would definitely recognize it if I saw it again).  The cafe mocha I ordered was the best one I'd ever tasted.  It tasted like chocolate without the bitterness of coffee.  Fabulous!  Little Italy is full of color and reminiscent of a European town.  Plenty of locals and tourists sitting outside cafes and restaurants idly enjoying their day with friends and family.  We walked back to Chinatown on the way to the Piers and we discovered a tea tasting store.  It's called "Vital Tea Leaf".  It's run by a man called, Kenny.  He prepared and presented the different kinds of teas for our tasting.  He is very funny, a natural showman.  We enjoyed our time there immensely.  We bought a couple of different types of teas from him.  I bought one that he swears is good for high blood pressure, cholesterol and several other ailments but it's the worst tasting tea I've ever tasted.  I also bought a tea that is suppose to be good for my allergies, this one tasted good.  I'm going to drink those two teas daily and we'll see if there are any improvements to my issues.  Wouldn't it be great if tea can cure my maladies.  After filling up with tea we walked towards Pier 1 to the Ferry Building Marketplace.  On the way we walked through a water fountain with water falls and took some pictures as tourists would do.  The Ferry Building is nice with stores, coffee shops and restaurants.  I found it catered more to tourists and business professionals.  A very commercial type of place.  I really enjoyed myself in Chinatown and Little Italy because you get a real sense of atmosphere.  We trekked back to the BART Powell station, got on the train and after drove back home to our realities.

 A mural in Chinatown.

A mural in Little Italy.

 Art work:  Open books with empty pages

Because all the words fell out.

Water fountain sculpture in front of the Ferry Building Marketplace.

He Knew He Was Right

I just finished watching a BBC period drama called "He Knew He Was Right" based on a novel by a Victorian novelist, Anthony Trollope.  The story is about a young newly married couple, Mr. and Mrs. Louis and Emily Trevelyan.  The first year of their marriage was blissful until an old friend of Emily's father, Col. Osborne, starts paying her regular visits.  Louis, her husband, becomes jealous of the friendship.  The jealousy turns into obsession when society starts gossiping about his wife and her relationship with the colonel.  The obsession becomes so severe it threatens his marriage and his relationship with his wife and young son.  Around them are other related stories of a flirtatious clergyman who leads two sisters to believe that he loves each of them, causing them to compete for his affections and a young woman companion to a wealthy, elderly, overbearing aunt who opposes her marrying the man she loves.
As I watched the story unfold I was incredulous to see Louis' love for his wife turn into something else, more like insanity.  The very rigid rules of Victorian society and it's effects on a man with a weak mind who couldn't or wouldn't stand up to protect his wife from the idle gossip.  I found the clergyman and the two sisters incredibly funny and the love between a young woman and her aunt very heartwarming.  From what I've read (reviews) it was a very good adaptation of the novel.  Personally I haven't read the novel but I am now very interested in doing so.  It's available on Netflix if you're interested in watching.

Michelle Obama's Advice for Women on Relationships

Advice for women on relationships with spouses and with each other: "Do not bring people in your life who weigh you down. And trust your instincts ... good relationships feel good. They feel right. They don't hurt. They're not painful. That's not just with somebody you want to marry, but it's with the friends that you choose. It's with the people you surround yourselves with. And that's just as important as the school that you choose. Who's in your life, and do you respect them, and do they respect you? And are you respecting them. Right?
"And we as women in particular—and this is such an important message—starting today, you all have to be supportive of each other. You can't be jealous, and push and trip, you know? It's hard enough."
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"Do not bring people in your life who weigh you down."  Very important advice from the First Lady.  We've all heard it said in many different ways but no matter how you say it, it's true.  I learned that lesson later in life, I wish I would have learned it sooner.  I'm doing my best now to keep negativity away from me because it's no one else's life but mine.  And I'm living it.  I'm doing what makes me happy and I don't care what anyone else thinks because at the end of the day I'm the one that has to look at myself in the mirror, I'm the one that pays my bills, and I'm the one that takes care of me.

Echolocation

Did you read that article on Live Science?  They have found that some blind people, not all, can echo locate like bats!  Amazing!  I find this shit fascinating.  Coming from me, a woman with the shortest attention span ever.  Isn't that something though?  Humans that can echo locate is another step up the evolutionary ladder.  They are also in the process of trying to find out if non-blind humans are able to echo locate.  Wouldn't that be cool.  That's like a Batman skill without the use of gadgets.  Awesome!!!

http://www.livescience.com/14327-blind-people-echolocation-brains.html