Camelot

Camelot

Saturday, May 24, 2014

Reality and a Breezeway

I've been away
My mind
Teetering
Between
Reality and a breezeway
Meters and kilometers
Cold hard cement
And bricks of red
I'm feeling bent
Oh I know
I'm not making
Any sense
But I'm reeling
I'm so close
To screaming
What I wish to say
But I think
I'll leave that
For another day

Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014

Thursday, May 22, 2014

Thursday

The days have flown by
With eventful skies
Thunder and lightning
Have been entertaining
As I sat by my window
And witnessed the night glow
Zeus roared his mighty roar
As his potent bolt soared
Across the inky blackness
It brought on such happiness

I could not describe


Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

The Final...Grunt

You are absurd madam
With your high-handed
Speeches
And your grasping
Clasping claws
You think you're
Bom chicka wah wah
Flirting with every
Cock-a-doodle-do
Even the ones
That have said 'I do'

When in fact
You're just a silly
Sad and lonely putti tat
Looking for your fat cat
That will never come

Ahhh...but maybe
He will
And I'll be
Proven wrong
But then again...
After the final...grunt
And you're thinking
He's forever yours
He might say
'I've gotta run
To the store
Don't worry
I'll be back'
And you'll see him
Nevermore

Isn't that
How the story goes...


Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014

Sunday, May 18, 2014

My Adventures in Cautery (Part One)

To all who are unfamiliar with the Philippines and their beauty culture well let me tell you a brief story of one of my experiences and yes there will be pictures...before and after.  Here in the Philippines the beauty industry is prevalent.  They have clinics galore, that are commonly called 'dermas' and most services are very affordable.  Let's just say, I'm in heaven.

This particular story involves cautery.  If you are not familiar with cautery it's when tissue is burned off, destroyed, through the use of electric current.  As we age, some of us develop skin tags or some type of non-life threatening cosmetic skin anomaly.  Well, I had a couple of skin tags forming on my right eyelid and one below my left eye.  So, I went in to one of those clinics to get an estimate for their removal.  The doctor took me into his examination room and looked at my skin through one of those magnified lamps.  He said I had several anomalies forming throughout my face and I should have them all removed.  (Although, personally I couldn't see any of the anomalies he mentioned.  Must have been microscopic...  The skin on my face looked as smooth as a baby's bottom, ok maybe wrong analogy.  Well anyhoo, the only thing I thought that disrupted my skin's smoothness were the skin tags on my right eyelid and the one below my left eye.)  I told him of my skin history and asked how long the recovery will take.  He said within a week the wounds would heal and within a month my skin will be better than before.  Well that appealed to my vanity.  Darned vanity!  I left the office to think about it and three days later went back in to have the procedure done.

That day was Monday, May 5, 2014.  The procedure itself was not painful.  He used a topical anesthetic cream thirty minutes before beginning.  I kept my eyes closed the entire time and could only hear the buzzing of the tool he used to zap whatever he was zapping.  After the procedure he told me to go straight home and not to touch my face or wash it for the next twenty-four hours.

That night my face ballooned to twice its size and when I woke up in the morning puss that had been leaking out overnight had dried up on the wounds.  Gross!!!  I called the doctor and he told me to come back to his clinic without washing my face so he could take a look at it.  I went in wearing a scarf and hat to cover my entire head along with big dark sunglasses...hahaha...  (Incognito)  He cleaned my face gave me an anti-inflammatory medication and told me to go back home and once again not to touch my face or wash it and then come back again the next day.

Well the next day my face had ballooned to three times its size and I was no longer recognizable.  I looked like a cartoon character.  If I died they wouldn't be able to visually identify me.  They would need dental records or a DNA test.  That's what was going through my mind as I stared horrified at the image that stared back at me in the mirror.  I did not go back to the doctor's office that day nor have I since.  There was no way I was going to walk about in public with weeping sores and that hideously bloated face.

It took over a week for the swelling and the weeping (the wounds and me) to finally settle down and my face to actually look normal again, except for the scarring or brown spots; I was left with brown spots all over my face.  How long that would take to fade I had no clue but I was determined to get rid of them sooner rather than later.

Now I know you all are curious as to how I looked during the swollen period, as I call it, I'm sorry to disappoint but I did not take selfies of myself at that stage.  Are you kidding me?  I wanted no reminders of that grotesque looking face and if it ever got in the wrong hands...well...blackmail city...let me tell ya!  I could always deny it was me, I WAS unrecognizable...except for my mole.  Darned mole!  Just kidding, I love my mole even though at one time I conducted an experiment to remove it using apple cider vinegar and blogged about it.  Thank goodness it was an epic fail.  I was just recently told that there are old beliefs that my mole is good luck...I inhale money they say...meaning I acquire money easily.  Well, ain't that somethin'!  If only it were true...

I did take a couple of selfies a week and a half after the procedure.  The swelling was completely gone but the spots are highly visible.  Surprisingly the spots on my eyelid have already faded.  What does that tell ya?  I should have stuck to my guns and told the doctor to just do the ones I asked for in the first place.




To be fair, I had watched several of my friends have this procedure done and none of them had any ill effects.  Nope, nada.  They had the procedure done one day and the next we were out shopping...go figure.  It's just me.  I seem to be the only ninny who had negative results.  Oh well, let's carry on, shall we...

{Part Two will be published in a few weeks}

(This poem was written during my 'swollen period'.  A dark time in my cautery adventure.)

My Monstrosity

I looked into the glass
I saw a beast reflected there
It gave me quite a scare
Maybe it was a glare
Or a light refracted square?
I screamed inside my mind
As bile wept
And so did I
Through the open sores
A lesson learned
To be remembered
For all of time

The fault
The fault is mine
I never should have
Gone in blind
I searched for probity
But all I found were lies
My vanity beguiled

Time is not my friend
Or is it?
Nor will I vilify
The cause of my
Monstrosity
When all I wished for
Was to beautify


Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014

Friday, May 16, 2014

The Coming Of Night

The days pass
Too quickly
On this
Aphotic isle
Where demons rise
With glowing eyes
To scour
The countryside
For willing brides

The nights rise
With its torrid gloom
My senses pure
I howl at the moon
She beckons
With surging tides
My voice lowers
As I croon

She bids me dance
I stomp my feet
Clap my hands
As if in a trance
Will he find me?
Tonight is a night
For romance

I sway to the music
Of the fading light
The drums roar
Heralding the coming of night
My pulse quickens
I sense he is near
I have no reason
To fear
But my feet
Are ready for flight

I feel him
He whispers in my ear
And my wickedness
My wickedness
She knows
He is just right


Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Because We Can




Love
Love
Love
It tears your heart
Into a million pieces
Not cleanly
As if sliced
By a surgeon's scalpel
With precision
And accuracy

No

From your breast it's torn
Ripped, mutilated
By grasping hands
Wished you'd never been born

Hate filled words
The uncaring
Who ignore
Blunt swords
Leave bruises
Veiled
Your soundless
Wails
Unanswered

Treat you
As second best
As if you're just
One of the rest

Why
Do
We
Hurt
The ones we love?

Because we can


Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

Speckled with Gold


This shield
My armor
Staves off
Burning
Streams

Solar powered
Light
Beyond
The violet
In the spectrum
Wavelengths
Of violence
Stealthy villain
Unseen

My shield
My armor
Safeguards
Against
Those
Invisible
Malignant
Sunbeams


Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014


Sunday, May 11, 2014

I've Been Saved Or Is It Misbehave?

Love withheld
Love given
With gusto
A passionate life
Or a life of passion
I just don't know

My head swims
With dreams
Of the future
Or is it the past
Does anything
Ever last?

I have desired
Been on fire
Hip deep in mire
Have aspired
Even inspired
Been lost in quagmire
Elegantly attired
Afraid I'm about
To expire

In his arms

Lost in his charms
No need for alarm

For I've been saved
I've even shaved
My delicates

Oh do behave!

Don't worry I gave
At the church
But I will not
Be your slave
You naughty knave
Mmm...
But I do love
Your aftershave

I think I'm
About to misbehave!


Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014

Thursday, May 8, 2014

My Girls


(This photograph was taken about 5 years ago.  We try to get together once or twice a year.  It's hard due to busy schedules; work, family, etc...)


I've known these girls
A lot of years
Seen
Some crazy situations
Scary hallucinations

Out to the clubs at sixteen
In mini skirts and five inch heels
That's a nightly scene
In the city by the bay
And if you're pretty
You never have to pay

We went to a lot of parties
Danced a lot too
Between the four of us
There wasn't much
We didn't do

I miss my girls
We had so much fun
Especially when I
Was on the run

A kiss to my 'mentor'
I learned a lot from you
You crazy bitch
I knew, me
You'd never ditch
A kiss to my fellow joker
We loved playing tricks
On you know who
And we knew
She loved it too
And a kiss to my twin
Whom I met in detention
We did things too insane
To publicly mention

I love you girls
I always will
When I visit the bay
You know we're going to have to
Make time
For some wine
And chill

Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

What Is This?

What is this?
My lids flicker and dance
Pictures
Nightmares
Have me in a trance

A tiny girl
Not even five feet tall
Kicked in a shop window
Damn!  Bitch is crazy!
As I stood enthralled
Run!
Somebody screamed
Am I suppose to be
Having fun?
I ran
Another night awol

The lights
Go wiggly
They flitter and flash
My body trembles
As my teeth gnash

A phone call
The voice trembles
It says it all
A friend's been
Brought back
Screaming and crying
She's so small
She has a seizure
As she falls
Taken to hospital
Not allowed
To visit
Not allowed to recall

What is this?
As my lids flicker and dance
Pictures
Nightmares
Have me in a trance


Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014

Monday, May 5, 2014

Dented Flask

Lazily she took a swill
Of what she calls
Her golden chain
Or was it train?
What the hell
She's too far gone
To tell

She looks around
Looking for a man to kill
It's how she feels
Deep inside
Where all
The venom resides

She took another pull
From her dented flask
That's never full
And don't ever ask
To take a swig
She'll shoot daggers
With her eyes

You'll feel like
A stuck pig

Whatever happened
To the beauty
That she was
It ran off
She wasn't worthy
Like all the men
She had ever known
Since the age of ten
Abandoned
Alone
No one
To call
Her own

One stop left to paradise
She knew it for sure
No need to call the doctor
For the cure
She felt it deep in her core
Where the venom resides
Her liver was no more
Just one last drink
One last swallow
Then she'll walk

Through heaven's door


Copyright © Allene Angelica 2014